October 28, 2004

Yes, It Hurts

Okay, so the Red Sox won the World Series. As a Yankee fan, yes I'm distraught. But I'm not ready to blow my brains out or anything.

So all you Red Sox fans can quit calling me/e-mailing me to ask me how I feel. Let's just say I'll feel better when we come back next season with better pitching and maybe Carlos Beltran to boot.

For those Red Sox fans who continue to rub it in, I offer the following:


  • I hate Jason Varitek. Varitek sounds more like a Canadian snowboard company than the name of an American baseball player.
  • I hate Johnny Damon. Mostly because the "dirtbag look" went out with the 1991 Phillies. John Kruk, Darren Daulton and Lenny Dykstra could pull it off. Damon can't.
  • I hate David Ortiz. I have a friend named David Ortiz who doesn't follow baseball, and he's probably running around at work wondering why everyone's giving him dirty looks.
  • I hate Curt Schilling. Jeter should have bunted.
  • I hate Pedro Martinez and Manny Ramirez. There's a Supercuts right down the street, guys.
  • I hate Bill Mueller. Most people would pronounce that "Myoo-lur" but he has to be oh so frickin' special.
  • I hate Tim Wakefield. The worst knuckleballer since, what, the Neikro Brothers?
  • I hate Trot Nixon. He shares a first name with a synonym for The Hershey Squirts and a last name with a crooked president. What's to like?

Posted by THespos at October 28, 2004 01:56 PM | TrackBack
Comments
All comments are property of the individual poster who left them. Everything else, copyright 2005, Tom Hespos

Tom,
The two most respected managers in the game (Torre and LaRussa),got carried away with their "book of statistics" and failed to follow a very simple "theory in sports." "If he's playing hurt make him make the plays." eg. Bunt on Schilling and get him jumping off the mound to field bunts and see how well he can move on his bum ankle. (He struggled once when he had to cover first base)
They certainly were't hitting him and he did win 21 games. Were they (Torre and LaRussa) afraid to ask their "Super Stars" to "lay one down"???
I'm not suggesting that either team would have beaten the Red Sox, but they would have increased their chances with Schilling out.
Dad

Posted by: Dad at October 29, 2004 11:36 AM

You hate Johnny Damon now?

Posted by: Red Sox Nation at May 24, 2006 11:22 AM

Yeah, actually. I'm not a fan of his being on the Yanks. (I really don't like the Yankee practice of "If you can't beat 'em, join 'em - or make 'em join you.") Just about the only positive development has been that Damon has had to get rid of the dirtbag look.

Posted by: Tom Hespos at May 24, 2006 11:28 AM
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