Happy Birthday To Me!

I made it to 32!

Dennis, Cami, Jen, Craig and Sara got me a cake on Saturday night and sang Happy Birthday to me on the beach in Montauk. Last night, Mom invited the family over and we did it all over again. I snagged a bunch of cool stuff, including a metal detector, a power supply for my laptop, new grills tools, an air purifier for the office and a bunch of other cool new toys.

Today is the real day, though, and I'm working from home, waiting for Time Warner to fix my Road Runner.

A Real-Life Nightmare

Last night, I awoke with a start, coming out of a nightmare in which something nasty was attacking my legs. When I got my bearings, I turned on the light next to my bed to discover that my bicycle, which usually resides five feet off the floor on a bike rack on my wall, had fallen off the rack and landed on my legs. I have no idea how it happened.

Anyway, it freaked me out for a minute. I've got two small cuts on my right foot where the pedal hit it, but that's it, injury-wise. I was lucky. Equally lucky was the stuff in my room - somehow the falling bike missed a DVD player, an expensive flat-screen TV and a 150-gallon fish tank by inches.

Poltergeists:1, Tom:0

The Rumors Are True

A bunch of people have asked me about it, so I'll 'fess up.

Yes, I'm getting out of New York City.

None of this is due to reasons you might expect. Quite simply, my sister and I are buying the house we grew up in on Long Island. Even though Underscore is doing very well, we're still reinvesting money in the business rather than taking big payouts, so I can't afford to pay both my share of the mortgage and the rent my landlord wants for this place. So I'm going to move back to LI for a while.

A few other things contributed to this decision. One is that my apartment is a regal piece of crap, and it's not worth the nearly $2200 a month my landlord wants for it. It's a fourth-floor walkup with no doorman. Everything is old, old, old. And I seem to be the only one who does any maintenance in my place - when the plumbing goes, I fix it. When my upstairs neighbor screws up and floods my bathroom and hallway, I'm the one who is tasked with fixing the ceiling. The common hallways are littered with debris, dog hair and other messy crap. The wastelines don't drain as well as they should, so my tub and sink back up all the time. I'm just tired of this place and I don't think it's worth it anymore.

Also, I'd be lying if I didn't acknowledge that terror threats were in the back of my mind when I made this decision. It just doesn't make sense to me to pay all this money to live in a crappy, overpriced apartment that also happens to be in the city with the giant, red bullseye painted on it.

That's not to say I wouldn't love to live in New York again. When I can afford it again, I'll seriously consider moving back into Manhattan. Perhaps after the election...

One thing's for sure. I want to be out of here before the RNC comes to town. It's going to be a zoo in here, and I'm talking to several movers about scheduling the move between the 20th and the 29th.

Lastly, I think I just need a change of pace. My life lately has been all about work, work, work, come home, eat dinner, go to sleep, wake up and do it all over again. This isn't healthy, and I think moving out of the city will get me motivated to make some other changes in my lifestyle that I think I need to make.

Yes, the commute is going to suck for a while. Yes, living with three other people in cramped quarters while we do renovation work on the Wading River house is going to suck for a while. Yes, having to coordinate my schedule around the LIRR schedule again is going to suck. But I think the change of pace (and the reduction in expenses) will be worth it.

Eric Porres, Certified Repair Tech

phone.jpg

So while I was working remotely on Friday, alternately cranking out insertion orders and preparing for Sposbash, I get this e-mail from Eric:

Subj: Your phone took a tumble:
Body Copy: The wire got caught in the wheel of a chair here...the speakerphone works, but i've had to jerry-rig a way to use the handset until i can get someone from m5 to have it repaired/replaced.

This morning, I come in to find this. Everything looks normal on my phone, except there's this orange screwdriver jammed into it. Much like those construction workers who accidentally shoot themselves in the head with their nailguns, I'm afraid to remove it, out of fear that it will stop working altogether and I'll be without voice communication today.