Microsoft to Yahoo - Prepare to Be Assimilated
/It is unfortunate that Yahoo! has not embraced our full and fair proposal to combine our companies. Based on conversations with stakeholders of both companies, we are confident that moving forward promptly to consummate a transaction is in the best interests of all parties.
Translation: Lower your shields and surrender your weapons. Your technological and biological distinctiveness will be added to our own.
We are offering shareholders superior value and the opportunity to participate in the upside of the combined company. The combination also offers an increasingly exciting set of solutions for consumers, publishers and advertisers while becoming better positioned to compete in the online services market.
Translation: It's a fair offer, even though everyone knows the combined company wouldn't be able to find its own ass, even with the help of GPS satellites.
A Microsoft-Yahoo! combination will create a more effective company that would provide greater value and service to our customers. Furthermore, the combination will create a more competitive marketplace by establishing a compelling number two competitor for Internet search and online advertising.
Replace "more effective" with "lumbering," "greater" with "nominal," "more" with "less," and "compelling" with "distant."
The Yahoo! response does not change our belief in the strategic and financial merits of our proposal. As we have said previously, Microsoft reserves the right to pursue all necessary steps to ensure that Yahoo!'s shareholders are provided with the opportunity to realize the value inherent in our proposal.
Translation: Assimilation will proceed as planned. You have no chance for survival. Make your time.
I'll say it again. The best thing Google can do right now is let this happen. watch shareholders hold out for more money, and then let this happen.
